The Stay-At-Home Parent
- This Or That Mom
- Jun 9, 2019
- 14 min read
Updated: Jun 10, 2019
Work or stay at home with your children. Which is best? The answer to that question relies on so many variables. If I’m being honest, the idea of being a stay-at-home parent never appealed to me before I had kids. From high school to college, I was very career-oriented. I was not concerned about having a family, I just wanted to make money and build a career that I was proud of; I’ll even admit to having a bit of a negative stigma on the whole stay-at-home mom roll. I had no clue I’d end up struggling with this so much when I actually became a mom.
Now that I have children of my own, there’s NOTHING I want to do more than be with them all the time. There are so many factors to consider though, Can our family afford to lose my income? Do I want to give up the career I worked so hard to have? Will I enjoy being home all the time despite the lack of adult interaction?
All in all, you just have to see what suits you and your family. A happy parent is the #1 thing a child needs. Being a stay-at-home-parent is a massive commitment... it is a job that never EVER ends and can be so underappreciated. However, these SAHMs who shared their perspective of it have showed it can also be the most rewarding!
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
Oh, it is for sure knowing that I am not missing out on any milestone, or any step of development. Big or small, I get to see all that my girls are doing and that is the biggest blessing.
Why is it a good fit for you?
It’s a good fit because I like to be active and on the go, having two small children we like to get out to local parks and enjoy the things our town has to offer for families. I was not established in a career when we had our first child, I had just finished my undergrad. With the cost of childcare, it seemed like a no brainer for me to stay home with her. Also, my husband is a police officer and works nights, with an ever changing set of days he works. With his schedule, the best option is for me to stay home.
How does your family benefit from it?
My girls get opportunities to learn and play inside the home as well as on outings to the zoo, park, MOPS, etc. they get care everyday from someone who loves them and knows them best of all. It also optimizes the time that we get to spend together as a family and I think that is truly wonderful.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
To give yourself grace, you are doing enough! If the laundry doesn’t get done, that’s okay! If you need to use screen time to get a moment to yourself, that’s okay! Do your best, and that IS enough! Also, get connected with other moms, get out of the house and try to socialize. Although it can be hard it is so worth it to see what your area offers for local moms!
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
I LOVE being a stay at home mom. I love being the person my kids see all day instead of a daycare provider.
Why is it a good fit for you?
It’s been a good fit for me for the last 4 years. I haven’t went crazy yet. Once my babies are in school, I’ll start my career.
How does your family benefit from it?
My family benefits by not having to spend $1300+ on daycare and we don’t have to worry about someone hurting them. Scares me to death.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
Advice: Get out of the house. Go to the parks, play dates, anything.
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
My favorite part of being a stay a home mama is just simply being able to be with my daughter.
Why is it a good fit for you?
While having extra income is nice, it does not come close to comparing to the joy of being able to see my daughter grow up.
How does your family benefit from it?
We can invest in 'nice' things or 'fancy vacations', or we can just simply be home and create the memories that will last forever. It also enables me to spend time on other things I couldn't otherwise do - like running a motherhood blog and spending more time organizing my house.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
It's not easy, in fact being a SAHM can be much harder than a job! It takes 24/7 effort - but it's SO much more rewarding!
And I love every minute of it.
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
What I enjoy most about being able to stay home with my kids is being able to be present for ALL moments! Breakfast, fun day activities, bath time, etc!
Why is it a good fit for you?
It’s a great fit for me because I’ve always wanted to be able to work from home to be able to be there 24/7! I used to work 3 jobs outside of the home and missed everything and I hated that.
How does your family benefit from it?
My family benefits from me being home because I am able to truly focus on giving them my time, I can focus on homework with them, and all the snuggles (when they want to snug me haha)
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
My advice for moms considering staying home with their kids is to just go for it! Don’t wish for it or consider it for too long..if it’s something you really want..work hard and make it happen AND make sure you also still have your quiet mom time too still!
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
I enjoy being able to see my children grow and mature and never missing out on all the little things they do and say each day. Being able to focus on them without having to work outside of the home has been a blessing for our family. I realize this is not for everyone and I respect all motherhood journeys!
Why is it a good fit for you?
This has been a perfect fit for us because my husband enjoys working outside of the home & I am more of a homemaker at heart.
How does your family benefit from it?
Without the cost of daycare we’ve been able to live off one income and we’ve learned to make better financial decisions as a result.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
My advice to to anyone considering becoming a SAHM: if you don’t think you can afford it...don’t let that stop you! We were so nervous about losing my income AND adding two babies (twins) but somehow it all works out! We definitely have made many sacrifices along the way but our hearts are so full!
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
It's the little things I enjoy about being a stay at home mum... The giggles, the messy lunchtimes, dancing around the kitchen when our favourite song comes on...
Why is it a good fit for you?
It's a good fit for me because I have the freedom to do what I want with my days. It's so hard to find jobs that fit around the school runs these days and I wouldn't want to pay someone else to do it - that's what part of being a mum is for me.
How does your family benefit from it?
My family benefit from me staying at home because they get my undivided attention - we spend our days making memories, reading stories, exploring and learning. Even chores like sweeping the floor can be so fun for little ones - it's all about turning things in to games and I love that they will look back on those times.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
To anyone who is considering being a stay at home parent... Take that leap, make those memories. We only have 18 summers and 18 Christmas' with our children before they become adults so take every day in between and treasure it.
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
Getting to stay home with my girls is truly a blessing. I love getting to spend so much time with them and watch them change and grow! Our bond is so strong and I truly believe it is because I am able to stay home with them.
Why is it a good fit for you?
It’s a good fit for me because it allows me the opportunity to do more things that I love. It not allows me time with my girls, but it allows me the opportunity to work a job that I love right from home!
How does your family benefit from it?
My husband and I depend on each other more now that I stay home vs when I was working full time. It has brought us closer together. I value how hard he works to provide for us financially and he values how hard I work at home. The girls benefit because they are spending the most time with their parents vs other people.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
It’s not the most glamorous job, but I truly believe that it is the most rewarding. You will never regret spending more time with your kids! Remember to still take time for yourself and know that raising your kids is full of so much purpose and value!
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
I enjoy being able to have a flexible schedule and time to enjoy spending with my kids. I have always enjoyed "house-work" more than my 8-5 accounting job (I know feminists must probably cringe when I say that!). Cleaning is legit a passion for me! I can't help what I love to do! I love that I am raising my kids like my mother raised me instead of watching someone else raise them from afar.
Why is it a good fit for you?
It never appealed to me to live a life where I was constantly having to worry about getting out the door to get the kids to daycare before I had to report to work, or rushing out of a meeting so that I could make sure to pick them up on time. I never wanted to be the person that was thinking about my kids at work and not being able to focus on my work, and thinking about my work when I was home with my kids. I know there are MANY women capable of this, I am just not one of them. It also didn't make sense for me to continue with my job when we move frequently for my husband's job and my entire paycheck would go toward childcare. I didn't want to have to work just to put my kids in daycare.
How does your family benefit from it?
I take care of all the house stuff without any compromise. I pick up the groceries, cook dinner, prepare lunches. I schedule all the doctors and dentist visits. I do all of the cleaning around the house. I do the laundry. I do all of these things during the week so that we can spend time as a family in the evenings and weekends. That family time is extremely important to me.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
Definitely make sure its right for you! If you are someone who needs to be around constant adult interaction to thrive then this will not be for you. It can definitely be isolating, but if you are good about getting out of the house every day (I schedule a 10-12 outing every day!) you will feel a lot better. Keeping busy is key. I always say the second I sit down is the second I feel lazy and unmotivated and that can take a real toll on you and your family!
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
Being a mom is the hardest job in the world. Whether you stay home or not, every mom has different needs, priorities, and goals. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer on whether or not one should stay home with their children. However, being a stay at home mom is right for ME. What I enjoy most is having peace of mind that my child is in the best care possible and being there for every milestone, field trip, school plays, and sick days. The list goes on.
Why is it a good fit for you?
It’s the perfect fit for me because I love to be on my own family’s schedule. The flexibility is ideal. I love that I can make plans and not have to run it past my boss. I don’t like living around someone else’s corporate/business needs.
How does your family benefit from it?
My family benefits from me staying home in so many ways. I handle all doctor appointments, home updates in the middle of the day, sick days, errand running, meal cooking, coaching of tball teams, school events, volunteering at church and picking up and dropping off at school. My husband is able to go to work with peace of mind that his children are taken care of. I also run a business from my phone around my family’s schedule which has provided very well for us.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
My advice for moms considering staying home with their children is to not lose yourself. Try to find something for YOU, a hobby or side hustle to focus on and bring you out of “mom funk”. To remember that while you may not be bringing in a physical paycheck, your job is the most important in the world. Mother’s truly make the world go round and what you do is NOT easy. And lastly and most importantly is to not compare yourself to other moms. Living in a social media world makes it so easy to compare your life to others but you must remember that social media is a highlight reel and that all of us are struggling to get through our days with littles ;)
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
The absolute best part of being a stay at home mom isn’t just watching them grow, or even explore the world around them; its getting to see the look on their beautiful little faces when they learn something new. That is what means the most to me, and knowing they are always safe with me and not someone else.
Why is it a good fit for you?
I was a former teacher and I've always loved working with children. I feel forever grateful for my family because they are the reason I am fortunate enough to be a stay at home mom. I know a lot of women who just aren’t financially able too and as amazing as it is in Canada to have a full year of Maternity leave, it just never feels long enough. Being a stay at home mom fits very well in our family’s values and I honestly love it even thou sometimes I do miss being out in the working world with other adults sometimes.
How does your family benefit from it?
My husband had a horrible childhood and because of it we decided long before our daughter was born that I would become a stay at home mom, and that was I would be there to keep our children safe and make the right decisions for them. I find my family benefits from me being a stay at home mom in so many ways, we get to have a home that works for us and our comfort in knowing our child will always be taken care of properly.
Advice for moms considering stay at home with their children?
SELF CARE, SELF CARE, SELF CARE! Whether that’s time out for yourself, getting your nails done or going for a walk alone. In order to keep giving to everyone else, you need to make sure you’re taking care of yourself first.
Blog: https://www.alearningstory.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stephanievainer
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
What I enjoy most is not missing any of the small moments. Seeing every mile stone and every triumph.
Why is it a good fit for you?
It’s a great fit for me because I am patient and love to nurture. I have peace with taking things slow.
How does your family benefit from it?
Although I am not bringing in an income, childcare is very expensive in the market where I live! We are able to afford much more with me staying home, as well as we can guarantee that the influence/teachings she is receiving are fitting our standards.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
My advice would be to not lose yourself in the process. Find someway to anchor your individualistic needs and hold true to them. Be sure to stay yourself as a wife and as a woman and not solely as a mother.
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
What I enjoy most about being a stay at home mom: I love having the opportunity to watch my child grow up. I love being able to teach my son new things, rather than someone else teaching him, and me hearing about what he learned. . Being a stay at home Mom is hard, but the good times outweigh all the hard times. Being a present is so important and I’m so blessed to have that opportunity.
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
I love being able to watch Judd grow and learn new things everyday! Each stage has been such a fun, new adventure.
Why is it a good fit for you?
I have felt called to be a mom since I was a little girl, and it’s honestly my dream “job” and lifestyle. Also, my husband is a Pastor, so it works super well with our schedule to be able to raise a family plus be in the ministry!
How does your family benefit from it?
I feel like we benefit from it in many avenues! My husband and I are constantly growing and stretching as we navigate through this parenthood walk. It’s actually helped us learn how to communicate even better with one another! But one of my favorites is being able to spend every day with my kiddo.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
If it’s also your dream, I say go for it!! But I also definitely support working moms, too. My advice is don’t be a stay at home mom just because you feel pressured to do it. Do it because you really desire it in your heart! Whatever you decide personally for you and your family, it will be amazing. If you feel like you want to stay at home but you can’t afford it financially, God always makes a way! I felt like this for awhile, too. Another passion of mine is helping moms become financially free so that they can stay at home and not have to be stressed out in the financial avenue! Please reach out to me if you would like help in this area to make your dream of staying home become a reality!
My personal website:
www.eternallyhealthy.org
What do you enjoy most about being a stay at home mom?
The number one thing I enjoy most about being a stay at home mom is not missing any moments. Time is our most precious gift. People always tell you “don’t blink it goes by so fast” and it truly does. I never want to miss a milestone, the first roll, giggle or step!
PS- as I’m writing this my 4 month old little boy rolled for the first time!
Why is it a good fit for you?
I’ve always wanted to be a stay at home mom! I have a degree in early childhood education and a masters degree in reading. I guess you could say I love children! But, when it comes to my own I want to be the one raising my baby.
How does your family benefit from it?
My husband is a Los Angeles City firefighter. He has an amazing schedule that allows us to travel and spend time together as a family. While I was teaching I always seemed to day dream about following a different path so I could be off and travel with him- especially when we started to grow our family. What benefits my family the most is that I’m present. I’m %100 focused on taking care of myself which in turn helps me take care of them.
Advice for moms considering staying at home with their children?
My advice for moms considering staying home with their babies is to go for it! If it is something you really want to do - do it! These moments we will never get back. Because I decided to take a leap of faith and stay home I was able to start my own business, began surrounding myself with other positive mommas, started to work on my personal development so that I could become the best possible version of myself. I’m learning more of who I am, the woman I’m still working on becoming and what fuels my soul all while being home with my little man. This is the best and most rewarding job in world!
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